fats?weight?

im getting abit irritated already... wads all these talk about fats n weight? y does everyone wants to b so skinny n go about dieting, not eating? ya..its true that most pple prefer to stay slim but there are many ways to do so other than dieting! for eg exercise... that is e best way to lose fats if u ask me... dieting is of nooo use! because by nt eating ... u will lower ur metabolic rate and nxt time when u start eating again.. u would realise that u will put on weight faster... which is no good... pls... take that im begging u... dun go on diet pls... u are already v skinny... losing weight wun make u look nicer..instead u will nt look nice!! stop saying that u are fat cux u are not... do u know that if u constantly think that u r fat when u r nt ... u will subconsciously like start to eat lesser n lesser n eventually become anorexic... if that is really wad happens... ur future will b gone...i will nv diet k... trust me tooo...
company dancers do diet... because mainly of e peer pressure arnd them.. but they do so aftr seeking doctors' advice unlike teens nowadays who simply diet n stop eating n stuff to lose weight..


walao... y r there UNTRUE rumours going arnd these days!!!!??

decision made

i m nt taking adv found this yr... e decision is set...


sighx...sch reopen tmr.. gonna see his face again...omg...im gonna puke



royal ballet...only able to see it fly past my eyes... w/o even being able to watch them dance... alina cojocaru... tamara rojo... sighx

adv found

damn...i only gt till mon to decide if i wanna take adv found leh...y is e time so short manx...if onli i had one more wk to think about it... i seriously dunno...
why i should take

1. i wun know what will happen in e nxt yr...whether i will injure myself or deprove i wont know...
2. y should i waste 1 yr doing nthg?
3. wad makes me so sure that i will nt have more work in sch...or that sch will b less stressful?
4. i would have something to motivate me in... so my passion for dance would nt die out...

why i shouldnt take

1. i am already struggling with e huge workload in sch n if my results continue to b this lousy...im officially dead
2. we just shang ren...workload x2
3. taking piano practical in sept if im nt wrong... if i take adv found too... i will really b damn stressed out...i tried this b4 2 yrs ago... i almost died
4. i promised lyn i will take with her nxt yr
5. i have a high chance of nt doing well... last yr's inter already gave b a v bad experience

how...how?? pros n cons are about e same leh... sherry was saying to throw a dice but... we have to be factual ritex... as in ... have to tink about pros n cons... gahhhhhhhh.. -confused-

wad e..

bsp is driving me nutx manx... 2500 words essay in chi on china history... wad e hell manx... how do they expect us to complete it la.. ya... they think its so easy rite... to the extent that i only completed 1 paragraph of about 20 words aftr like 2 or 3 days on research on some stupid historical guy that died like millions of yrs ago... y bother so much bout him la... i mean ya.. wads e purpose... im getting damn pissed off manx...



balllet tmr...=)

confused

i thought i had made up my mind not to take...
but yet come to think of it..
i really wun know what will happen in e nxt yr...
whether i will deprove or be injured..
who knows.?
but this yr...i haven exactly gotten use to sec 3 life...or dhp..
needing to go 4 ballet everyday...
i seriously dun tink i will b able to cope
sighx... phoeb n kel no need to say sure taking 1..
belle n deb most prob i guess
shld i wait 1 yr? or go ahead?
am i happy with just a pass...
i know i cant aim for distinction...my standard is far frm that...
but... who doesnt wanna do well ritex...
how...how??
state of depression

danceee

mon's wudao was fun...tho it left me with severe aches n pains e nxt day which is today...went for ballet today aftr like eons n e nz pple are back... everyting they did there sounded so fun... think most of them improved aftr going there lo...haix... feel kinda... different somehow... k nvm.. miss phoeb n kel alot... sighx... mux be tough there but u too gotta b strong kx...miss ya loads


i dun wanna take adv found!!!!!!!


frustrations confusions back before sch has even reopened...
im so gonna die
depressed

yay

yay..3 cheers for me... i dun feel like dancing anymore... haven been to any of e clses this wk except for mon n i am not planning to go for more... i have lost my passion completely... this is seriously bothering me... sighx.. one cannot dance without passion... i mean ya... wat's e use of dancing if it is jux for the sake of dancing? i can forget bout going for cls when e nz pple return man... yay-ness*sacarstic*... i dun really feel anything bout e fact that i cant go to watch e royal ballet.... if it was last yr dat i couldnt go... i would be going arnd begging pple for tickets... i mean its e ROYAL BALLET but now... -needa go back to sch e nxt day... no time to go... -n stuff lidat... this is NOT LOOKING GOOD


chi proj is driving me nutx...spent one whole aftrnoon analysing 3 pges of e brochure...one whole night completing another pg... wow... by the time i finish... christmas probably would have arrived...

back from bintan

went for a short hol to bintan yesterday morning n came back this evening... hmm.. didnt do much jux eat n slp in e hotel going out to shop onli once... hmm... the things there are v expensive... esp e food... ate in e hotel for all e meals.. 2 buffets....omg... imagine how much fats gained manx... but gahhh...

felt quite bad for nt going for cls today... parents convinced me nt to... say will b too tired n stuff... quite true acty la... felt sorta seasick after leaving e ship but thought that today wasnt as bad as yesterday... almost puked manx yestrday... ya... tmr cnt go for cls again... heard that ms kok is teaching... hmmm... fri i guess... gahhh... but prefer to do cls on our own seriously...

reading jm's blog bout how much she loves ballet.... realli envies... how i wish that i could have that passion for dance tooo... e passion that i used to have

tons of hw left...im so dead when sch reopens....i dun wan

 

If only sylvie guillem would b here...omg...

 

Alina Cojocaru!! oMg!! she's going to be e lead for e royal ballet prfmance on 24-26th june...oh man...i wanna go watch... but e tickets price so ex..booo...n no more tickets...

last day

last day of summer sch today...ahahx.. tink today was better...as in i could get more of exercises... ahahx.. love e grand allegro manx... always feel like im flying.. n e allegro as usual was really challenging... n i didnt know we could acty beat a sisonne..ahahx...
i like e repertoire dance!!hahax.. v cool... hope i wun do any mistakes tmr... tiring but fun...whee...
contem was slack today...we only went thru e dance a couple of times and she let us off v early...
ms wallis rawk totally...i really learnt alot frm summer sch... tho i didnt really enjoy it at e beginning...but towards e end... i tink i've learnt alot... really alot...sue goodman too...shes damn funny
performance day tmr...long day...ahahx.. at least being performers beat being helpers... lalala










ninpok...jm... i miss u guys loads.... waahhhhhh....

summer sch day 3

hmm...3rd day of summer sch already.. time really flies... oh manx.. there's pointe tmr.. im so jux going to lose all my face doing pointe...sighx...n my allegro totally suck... my brain is jux so slow manx...gahhh

we finished e repertoire dance...contem too..ahahx... nice!=)

ahahx...n i wanna change my lay..

summer sch day 1

woke up early this morning to go to ahma's house... supposed to do some studying but as usual... being distracted by some other things... hmm... ahahx.. like helping to peel onions!! yupx.. n i ate tapioca too... which reminded me of e tapioca they made up eat in e level camp which had a really weird taste which almost made me vomit... but according to me grandma ... this tapioca is from japan and it's quite expensive... tho not e most expensive type... its nice... n sweet!!hahax.. heard that e most expensive type of tapioca costs about $6 per tapioca or sthg lidat... hahax... learnt sthg new...

left house and went to meet up with phoeb at her sch... took mrt to scgs... n we did nt get lost n were early!! ahahx... my 1st impression of all e girls in e cls... one word to describe--pro... n i felt sorta bad at 1st.. felt like i was v lousy aftr looking at all of e other girls arches... barre...nthg special.. centre too except for allegro... gahh... with my usual slow brains... i cant get e wrk la... sighx... hope tmr's classical will b better manx... didnt feel like i'd worked much...

repertoire... ahahx... fun.. tink its quite cooll... we are supposed to use fans n according to lynn wallis... we are supposed to each represent a country.. cux that's a ball where e prince [SWAN LAKE!!] is supposed to choose a bride... wonder if she is serious about us needing to wear costumes representing our countries...ahahx.. den wad... china wear qipao???!!!!???

contemporary... ahahx.. sue was damn funny... n cute!!! ahahax... she will say sthg... n burst out laughing herself...ahahx.. n her laugh is damn cute la.. den we were laughing almost throughout e whole cls... quite cool la.. jux that felt more top thigh n calves... but thats normal for contem rite?

hmm...hope tmr's cls will b better... n that my brain will work faster to get e steps... gahhh

e passion is returning... it'd better be...

"The Performance"

The spotlight brightens
The music begins
I'm up on my toes
as I twirl and spin
I jump and I leap
From one side to another
feeling just the music
never any other.
I rise up en pointe
then down in plie
performing what i've practiced
for so long every day.
To dance is my dream,
I can't let it die
for when I do dance
I feel I can fly
The world can disappear
My troubles can cease
For just one moment
I am truly at peace.”

[jeanine:
hmm... think u are in aus by e time i post this msg n nt sure if u will read it but... nvm la... enjoy urself in aus ya.. n relax there... u deserve this break and all e best there kx...and thanx for ur msg too... i will stay positive...love ya loads..take care]

hoping v much to be inspired for e summer sch tmr...v scared leh seriously... needa stay positive..trying all my best to get e passion back...sighx

weird dreams

hahax..have been having weird dreams about cs these few days...ahahx.. wonder y manx... jux this aftrnoon when i was taking my nap... i dreamt that e whole cs was eating ba4 zhang3 together den jean asked me if i want another ba zhang... but... what i heard her say was.. do u want another ma2 tong3!!!!

NOT

jux finished my dinner...gahhx..returning home so late these days because of ballet..sighx..its depriving me of the chance to relax during e hols manx...ok..i shldnt say that...dance IS supposed to be something i like...something that can make me forget my troubles... but e prob now is... im losing it... im losing my passion for dance... i used to blame this on sch...on e stress sch is giving me...but mayb im wrong... its e hols now.. there's no sch n no stress... n yet... im still losing it... i dno wads e prob with me but.. whenever i go for cls these days... i will have a super sian-ed feeling... n will find a chance to slack whenever i can... theres no more drive to push me to wrk harder... no more passion... i dance for e sake of dancing... n that's NOT wad a dancer shld b doing...

summer sch nxt wk..sorta not looking forward to it... i noe.. im jux gonna embarrass myself by going there... i shldnt have signed up manx... sighx... my standard is way below e others... going for it will only make me look like a fool... haix.. nvm... shall jux go n have some fun... err... given that my passion will b back by then which i seriously dun think will happen...gahhx

I NEED MY PASSION BACK!!!